Don't Leave

He was standing there with a perplexed expression and just like the atmosphere, clouds, rain, a bit dim environment he too seemed unreal. Especially when his gaze shifted from the ground to my face, another coincidence.
I was at a distance of course but distance never really keep me from observing my surrounding and so it never kept me from observing him. That is the best thing, I am unconsciously never unaware of what is going on around me, this is not a habit but quality which is entirely unintentional.

Observing him was sometimes more intentional though and that is what strikes the most when I think about WHY HIM, being a complete impossible and I was aware of it still I could not refrain from adoring every bit of his soul and existence. HE had this aura about him, he had drawn my attention like nobody ever did.

So he was unreal or in that particular time and environment he did seem so, for a moment I thought there was some exchange of words that happened between us that brought abrupt changes in my inner state and I grew restless! It had been long since we'd been strangers, we never really had anything between us, it was one sided story but I was so used to reading his face every time I saw him wandering around the corridors that it had become the only part about my day that I lived for.
I grew restless and I wanted to go and ask if everything was alright?
He seemed upset and I felt it!

That was his expression all day long, I went home like every other day and remained occupied with the thoughts of him. These thoughts have been his property and my heart his territory but he was unaware of it. Or not. I wasn't sure.

I couldn't sleep that night, thinking how my life would be if he wasn't around. His presence created a difference and I started bearing the hours spent in that place and for some reasons I had this feeling he won't be there for long, he would go forth his life track and take a step forward. That one step assuring that our ways were indeed separate.

And they say females have a strong sixth sense because the next day I kept waiting to have a glance at his face to see if he's fine he didn't show up. Weeks flied, he wasn't there and I withered!!!
Why would he be? Who was I for him to make him stay? I had no right to feel his absence but I did. Everything about that place I hated once and had forgotten for sometime when he was around, started coming back to me! I couldn't live...
Or so I thought. I was bound to be there for three more years, till my job there was done, and by chance he planned to return ever God knows where I would be? Not there for sure.

I never moved on, he did. I collapsed and with time learned to live with this ache. I never saw his face again, though the picture kept lingering in my thoughts forever.