I am mostly quiet these days or may be it has come to notice now that I rarely speak or interact with anyone, needlessly. Like actors are told to act the scenes and provided with script, my life especially in University is the same. I enter and I leave. In between this, all I remember are my numerous thoughts, meaningless and totally disturbing, dreading and distracting. It is like my thoughts keep tossing me between two zones. Zone of now which is dreaded with fears, exertion, fruitless efforts, all I see is a never ending road How I got there? What I mistook? I don't understand. And a zone of complete darkness that lead me numb. I snap out of it for a while when either I am called to help or if something is being asked which I am supposed to answer. I do not care who I meet or who I stand with, my mind does not spare me to notice and recognize the faces. Frankly speaking part of it is because I know the facade existences. It is like surrounded by many, knowing everyone and everything yet seemingly unaware of your surrounding.
I should stop feeling too much and come in terms with the fact that world is deceptive. Be it your own people, they will ruin you for no reason in the name of anything they themselves have assumed and everyone is going to turn their backs on you eventually. Whether they know the culprit or not.
It is all to hard to absorb at the moment.
I should stop feeling too much and come in terms with the fact that world is deceptive. Be it your own people, they will ruin you for no reason in the name of anything they themselves have assumed and everyone is going to turn their backs on you eventually. Whether they know the culprit or not.
It is all to hard to absorb at the moment.
That I hope I will soon.
You'll come to terms with it. Sadly, we all do.
ReplyDeleteI am hoping so =)
DeleteIt isn't hard to absorb at all. Possibly because many people, including myself, are living the same life. Personally, it's a bit eerie to know how your words depict my life, to the very last detail. I sure hope that things improve for all of us, but some days, there is just nowhere to run from your thoughts.
ReplyDelete*but some days, there is just nowhere to run from your thoughts*
DeleteExactly, sometimes it is too much to handle and I wish my mind would just shut up :(
I hope things turn out well for all of us and we get out pf this phase soon!
Your words remind me of my collage days!
ReplyDeleteI couldn't comment on your last post there was some problem with the page or something it would not display my comments! so I will write it here coz i wanted to tell you something!
I believe you are the person who can persuade life to leave the opposite end and come to stand with you as your best friend! :) cuz if you had the courage to talk of your pain then you surely are strong enough to change it into joy!
so don't lose faith...start to build again nd you'll rise stronger so nothing will be able to strike you down! :)
I am extremely honored!!
DeleteYOur words really serve like an appreciation pat! :)
Thank you very much :)
hey sweetie :) I already hope all these comment did make you smile, and fuelled hope :) As you said, it is hard, yes, it is damn hard and heart-wrenching to absorb. But then you have come to know, you are aware how you behave and what are things going, just that you lost interest. I guess, that does happen, in fact such episodes keeps repeating in one's life, at different stages.
ReplyDeleteDon't lose heart. As Aqsa said, since you have the courage to talk about it, you would overcome it too :) Just believe, which i know is the hardest thing to do now. But why not give it a try :) Take care and loadsa hugs and love :)
Yes they did :)
DeleteEverybody's comments matter and I am honored! :)
Yes, I am trying to focus and not lose hope. Faith and believe and I must assemble myself once more for life, no matter how worst it gets.
Thank you :) <3
Could feel you..:( Im avoiding ppl too..have become very quiet these days..
ReplyDeleteThere is no escape from it :(
Delete